INTRO

Being a dad can be lonely.

Many of us feel like we have to constantly look like we have it all together at all times, especially when we are also leading people at work.

We need community to be our best.

I truly believe that if we have healthier dad’s, we will have healthier communities.

Online we see a two ends of the spectrum. We see the Homer Simpson style dad who everyone like to poke fun of and we see the alpha dad with six pack abs who claims to have it all figured out.

The truth is most of us live somewhere in the middle and are just trying to figure it out.

I started a podcast exploring this topic with my friend Dylan.

Our goal is to show it’s okay to admit we don’t have all the answers and admit we are all just out here doing our best.

Last week we had a chance to interview the CEO of Dad Gang, a hat company and community that is taking the internet by storm right now.

Check it out here.

Would love your thoughts as we continue to explore this format.

Now, let’s dive into the lens…

Sponsored by Candor

As a leader, you know that strong relationships among teammates are the foundation of a thriving company culture. But in today's fast-paced work environment, it can be challenging for new hires and existing employees to truly get to know one another. That's where Candor comes in – the culture platform that helps teams build genuine connections, both inside and outside of work.

"Using Candor profiles has been incredibly helpful. When I first joined Common Group, I felt as if I only had insight into who a few people at the company were. Now, new hires are able to see all of their teammates instantly, while having increased visibility to who they are outside of work and what they stand for within this philanthropic sector. It's been a huge catalyst for teammates to build genuine relationships with one another." – Peter Catchings, Common Group

With Candor, teams can easily foster meaningful interactions among teammates through fun, lightweight missions:

• Give and receive shoutouts to recognize great work

• Check in with the team on both personal and professional levels

• Provide and request feedback to support growth

• Schedule and track 1-on-1 meetings to stay connected

• Run polls to gather insights and make decisions together

Candor's human-first approach sets it apart from traditional HR tools. Plus, with pricing starting at just $5 per teammate per month.

You can experience the Candor difference for themselves with a no-risk, 30-day free trial.

Make positive work vibes a regular thing with fun, light-weight team missions. 

LEADER’S LENS

Drowning in Inadequacy

Note from Jacob: This week we have a special guest post from my friend Ray White. He’s been a great friend for almost a decade now and has been leading teams in health care IT for about this same amount of time.

Stepping into my first corporate leadership role as a 25 years old felt like diving into the deep end without a life jacket. 

And I don’t know how to swim!

As a new Healthcare IT Supervisor, I was suddenly responsible for leading 32 staff members across six teams. Overwhelming doesn't even begin to describe it.

Most of my team members were older than me, some with more years at the company than I had been alive. Their deep expertise in healthcare, technology, and organizational processes left me feeling like a complete novice. 

My background? Sociology and nonprofit management. It was hard not to feel out of place.

Back then, I believed that leadership meant being as technically competent—if not more so—than the people I led. I thought my success depended on matching or exceeding their knowledge. 

But as I pushed myself to achieve that level of expertise, I was quickly consumed by feelings of inadequacy. I felt like an impostor, incapable of leading such an experienced team. 

At times, the weight of these emotions made me consider quitting.

What changed?

Through mentorship and self-reflection, I was reminded why I was hired in the first place: 

Build community and strengthen team dynamics. 

When I joined, the team was grappling with high turnover and key vacancies. Dissatisfaction among staff was affecting our collective performance.

It soon became clear that I didn’t need to be a database expert or master quality metrics to be an effective leader (though having that knowledge wouldn’t have hurt). What the team needed most was leadership rooted in empathy.

The Real Work!

I shifted my focus to understanding how the team functioned—both individually and collectively—and aligning our efforts with the organization’s goals. My role evolved into reducing turnover and addressing the frustrations between teams and leadership. 

I prioritized these three areas in my first 2 years of leadership:

• Improving cross team communication;

• Removing barriers inhibiting the team’s success, and; 

• Advocating for the necessary training that would help the team complete their work.

I made small but significant changes. I moved my desk from a secluded corner of the building to the central bullpen where my staff was located, making myself more accessible. Team members had a strange look on my face when I was moving my desk!

I spent time with the staff, getting to know them as people and allowing them to know me. I invited them to share their perspectives on decisions and encouraged them to take ownership of their ideas, always giving them credit for their successes.

We even started setting aside time for non-work-related activities based on their interests, something that hadn’t been done before. 

These changes weren’t just about boosting morale; they led to real results. Team members began contributing to strategic decisions, discovered new ways to collaborate across departments, and most importantly, reengaged with their work.

Looking back 10 years later, I realize how naive it was to think that being a leader meant mastering every technical detail right away. 

While technical knowledge is important (and I eventually strengthen that knowledge over the years), building a lasting, engaged team requires understanding the people behind the work.

How to Cultivate Empathy in your Leadership

Empathy has been the cornerstone of my ability to build efficient, cohesive teams. 

In my experience consulting with organizations, I’ve seen that creating workplace cultures that foster belonging and retention starts with leaders who practice empathy daily. Empathetic leadership isn’t just about retaining staff. It’s about addressing the human need for connection.

When leaders see their team members as individuals, not just as cogs in a machine, it reduces turnover and creates a thriving work environment. Empathy makes employees feel valued and understood, which leads to higher engagement and productivity.

As organizational leaders and middle managers, it’s crucial to model empathy and encourage its development within our teams. 

Doing so helps us better understand how our team members interact with us, how they engage with our personalities, and how they respond to the work we produce together.

Here are The Four V's that have helped me cultivate empathy in my leadership:

1. Understand Their Viewpoint: Reflect on your own biases and viewpoints, and how these impact your interactions with others. Deconstructing these biases helps create a more inclusive environment.

2. Create Spaces for Visibility: Be present and visible where your teams gather. Engage with them in their environments, showing them that you’re there to support and include them.

3. Display Humility and Vulnerability: Acknowledge your limitations and be open about not having all the answers. This vulnerability builds deeper connections with your team.

4. Respond with Validation: Acknowledge and validate your team members' emotions and experiences, even if you don’t necessarily agree with them. This helps create a space where they feel seen and heard.

Culture Change Starts with You

Empathetic leadership is a continuous journey of self-reflection and effort. 

By understanding different viewpoints, being visible, practicing vulnerability, and validating others’ experiences, you can create a more inclusive and supportive work environment.

How are you practicing empathy in your leadership?

Here’s to you being a culture change leader in your organization!

Ray

Connect with Ray!

Raymond White is a passionate organizational development consultant and coach dedicated to transforming workplaces into inclusive, engaging, and high-performing environments to increase the employee experience!

You can follow him on Instagram, on LinkedIn, and through his newsletter The Mid-Level Up